


From The Ashes

by idrilsdarkwritings (idrilhadhafang)



Series: Ascension of the Empress [2]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Dark, Angst, Beginnings of Finn & Ben Solo Friendship, Dark Rey (Star Wars), Dark Side Rey, Empress Rey, Evil Snoke, F/M, Finn and Ben Talk, Force-Sensitive Finn (Star Wars), Gen, Heartbreak, Heavy Angst, Jedi Finn (Star Wars), Kylo Ren Redemption, Minor Poe Dameron/Ben Solo, Past Abuse, Past Poe Dameron/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Past Torture, Redeemed Ben Solo, Sith Rey, Sort Of A Fix It In Places, Sort of Spoilers for TROS
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:54:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21976195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilsdarkwritings
Summary: Finn and the redeemed Ben Solo have a long overdue conversation.
Relationships: Finn & Ben Solo, Finn/Rey (Star Wars)
Series: Ascension of the Empress [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1580263
Comments: 4
Kudos: 53
Collections: Genprompt Bingo Round 17





	From The Ashes

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Winners and Losers
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

They’ve lost. Even that knowledge cuts like a vibroblade to Finn’s heart. Not only was everything they did for nothing, but Rey did it. Rey, of all people. Finn can only watch her as she gives her speech to the crowd (and something just plain wrong is in her eyes, something unnatural. They’re not Sith yellow, but...) and that feeling in his chest...that’s how one feels when a heart breaks. He just knows it.  
  
_Please, Rey. Stars’ sakes, don’t go this way._  
  
It’s unfair. The former Kylo Ren shouldn’t be here in her place. They have an ally, at least. It doesn’t shake that feeling of unfairness that Finn feels. Like Rey should be here, with them, and Kylo shouldn’t.  
  
***  
  
“So you’re here.”  
  
Finn and the former Kylo Ren confront each other. Poe’s still angry at the former Supreme Leader, and while Finn can’t say he blames him, there’s a more personal side to Poe’s anger that Finn can’t really explain. After all, Ben Solo’s just a monster, isn’t he? Former monster, but even though they’re both defectors, Finn can’t help but think of the man who carried Rey off to his shuttle, who apparently tortured her, who tried to manipulate her. The man who tortured Poe. Who killed his own father. The list goes on. And Ren — Ben — has the gall to just come here? Does he think that he can just wave his hand and all will be forgiven?  
  
Finn doesn’t ordinarily like thinking ill of people. But this...  
  
“Yes.” Ben sounds like a far cry from the man in the forest on the Starkiller planet. He just sounds broken. Finn’s not used to that. Hearing him sound just so exhausted. “I wish I had done it sooner.”  
  
“No stang. You wanted Rey on your side. You happy, now that you doomed the galaxy? Again?”  
  
Ben actually does look pained. Guilty. Then, “I didn’t want this. After Kef Bir...” Ben took a deep breath. “There’s nothing I can say that doesn’t seem implausible.”  
  
“So you had a sudden bantha shit change of heart?”  
  
Ben pauses. Then, “I suppose...I haven’t told anyone this. Telling you this is uncomfortable. But it’s the best way to provide context...FN-2187.”  
  
“The name’s Finn.” Finn snaps.  
  
“Okay.” Ben takes a deep breath. “There was a boy. A very foolish, lonely boy, who had two friends: the voices in his head, and a pilot. Of course, the boy and the pilot were separated, and the boy went to his uncle’s Academy. The pilot ran away from home.”  
  
Finn stares in disbelief. “You and Poe...”  
  
Ben shrugs. “So he never told you? I suppose it’s no surprise he wants to forget me. After what I’ve done. But yes, even though the boy was sent away to his uncle, Snoke found a way. Snoke, and his master Palpatine, sensed the boy’s power. The equal potential for good and evil. They had been watching him. Never anything terribly blatant. It was just enough, to survey him, to make sure everything proceeded as they had foreseen. The boy was sensitive as well. Telepathic. Of course, it was Snoke who suggested later to use his telepathic tendencies as a weapon against prisoners, as he saw the potential to make interrogation more efficient. Why use shocks and knives when uncovering memories can work just as well? It never even left visible marks.”  
  
“You could have made a stand. You could have said no.”  
  
“I did. Snoke...I can remember he shocked me with Lightning. He was powerful; even distance couldn’t keep him from enacting punishments as he saw fit. But I can remember.” Ben seems to be staring at the wall, like it’s the only grounding thing in the room. “I can remember hating Poe. Envying him, that he was safe, most likely favored by my mother...and I had Snoke. I never knew why she didn’t do anything to help me when Snoke and Palpatine were after me. Why she no doubt felt Snoke punishing me from across the galaxy, and didn’t lift a finger to help me. Why she was angry enough at Lando Calrissian after he seemingly betrayed my father, and yet I wasn’t worth saving.” A beat. “While Snoke put me through the sort of training I promised myself I’d never put the Knights of Ren through, my mother ignored it. All in favor of a man who’s nothing like the man I was friends with. The man I loved.”  
  
“You loved him?” _Yeah, Finn,_ Finn’s thoughts go sarcastically, _He loved Poe so much that he tortured him._ “What you’ve got...that isn’t love.”  
  
“I did once. I do still. I had a kinship with Rey, but she isn’t Poe. And even if I wanted her to be, her weakness has always been you.” A beat. “When she defeated me...she wouldn’t have gone that far if not for you.”  
  
Finn swallows. When he remembers Poe telling him that Rey won (and he was relieved. After all, he had been so scared for Rey), he hadn’t mentioned that. How far she was willing to go, all for him.  
  
“Good on her,” Finn says, softly. Then, despite himself, “Tell me more about the boy.”  
  
“His uncle tried to kill him.”  
  
“What?” The word comes out flat, numb. Luke, the same man who was willing to see potential in Vader? Even if Ben Solo was a monster at the time, Luke wouldn’t have just gone “kriff him, he deserves to die”. It seems, Finn thinks, Han was the only one who didn’t see him as irredeemable. Finn tries to think of what Kylo did, including mutilating him with his lightsaber hard enough to leave scars. It almost works. Almost suppresses the image of a boy feeling unwanted and cast away. If he deserved it...  
  
Ben nods. “He did. He no doubt didn’t tell anyone. Thought that seeming right was more important than being right.”  
  
Ben tells him more, of course. Some of these things Finn already knows. He was there, after all. It’s when Ben finishes that Finn wishes he knew what to say. He swallows. “That’s quite a lot,” he says. “I mean...it doesn’t make what you did okay. But...I am sorry it happened.” He still needs time to sort through everything. Time to think. Ben’s just joined them, and Finn has no idea what to think of him. Victim or monster? Maybe he’s both.  
  
At least, one thing Finn’s overwhelmingly certain of is that Palpatine is unbelievably petty. And Luke was a fool. Okay. Maybe that makes two.  
  
“I figured that,” Ben says. “Finn...there’s something that you didn’t get to tell Rey. Before she fell.”  
  
Finn nods. “Though I don’t appreciate you prodding my head.”  
  
Ben nods. He looks a bit embarrassed. “It does explain a lot. How you held up against me so long on the Starkiller planet.”  
  
“Yeah.” Finn isn’t going to lie; he isn’t ready for this. He isn’t ready for a position where he is good as the last Jedi now. The Force good as took the woman he loved, and he doubts he can forgive it for that.  
  
“You need a teacher,” Ben says. “And so do I.”  
  
“I don’t like the idea of training with you. Stang, I don’t know if I like you...as a person.”  
  
“Fair. I guess.” Ben sighs. “We just need to be prepared to fight her.”  
  
“Yeah.” Finn doesn’t want to think about it too hard. In the end, he’s scared for her.  
  
They make their agreements, and Finn gets up. He didn’t think he’d be fighting side by side with the former Kylo Ren. He supposes that war makes strange friends.


End file.
